Crazy is that you?

My stepmother sent me a “care package” the other day I don’t mean to sound ungrateful but I guess that’s just the kind of stepdaughter I am. About a month ago she told me that she really wanted to send me my fathers ruby ring that he used to wear every day. I thought it was a sweet gesture of her, but didn’t think much of it. But every time I talked to her she was continually mentioning to me that she was going to get it in the mail soon, as if she kept picturing me desperately pacing in front of my mailbox on a daily basis and peering in wondering when it would arrive.

When the box arrived I was somewhat surprised by all the wonders it contained. My first thought was that it seemed like she walked around her house and just randomly picked up odd items and put them in a box to send me. There was an old (like 80’s old) pair of her earrings, an old handkerchief of my dad’s (Ewww), a heart rate monitor (WTF?) a VHS movie, the ring, a Polaroid picture of my father, his old city councilman ID, and letters that she and my father wrote to each other which I feel kind of uncomfortable reading.

I immediately sent her a nice email thanking her for the box and telling her how sweet it was of her to send everything to me (even though its still in a desk drawer, if you need a heart monitor email me!). Then I talked about a few things going on with me and signed off thanking her again for the care package. The next day she sent me an email asking if it came. I responded telling her it did, that I had sent her an email previously, I thanked her again, babbled on about work and jury duty and then forwarded the email I’d sent the day before (just in case).

Two days later I received another email asking about the package. I responded telling her how much I appreciated the package, mentioned that I ‘d sent her a couple emails previously, thanked her again, babbled on about upcoming travel plans and the guy in Atlanta and then forwarded the emails I’d sent her previously.

The next night I received a crazy email from her asking what had disappointed me in the box and that she hoped she hadn’t upset or hurt me in someway. Now I’m thinking ok crazy much? I mean was she fishing to hear something particular? And why were three emails not enough of a thank you for her? For god sakes thank you for the handkerchief already!

I sent her an email completely bewildered and said I didn’t understand what she meant, I had emailed her several times and forwarded them as well and that maybe she wasn’t reading the entire emails? I mean, I wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt here but I don’t work well with guilt trips and really am not getting the point of all of this.

I forwarded the email to my mother for her take on it, they are both older ladies after all maybe she “gets it”? I asked her if she thought maybe SM was crazy? Her response was, “Well she was married to your father for over 20 years.” Today I forwarded them both a cute joke and my mother sent me an email and asked if I thought my stepmother would mind if she emailed her and sent her some cute animal emails occasionally (seriously that has got to be some kind of generational thing). I told her I didn’t think SM would mind at all but that she needed to realize that she was opening the door for crazy to come in!

P.S. Where’s the chocolate? I never heard of a care package that didn’t include chocolate. I mean my mother can throw some crazy shit in a box and call it a care package (hangers) but she never forgets the chocolate.